December 15, 2013 to July 11, 2026

Our Mama — Ana

The girl who chose me.

I don't know how to say goodbye to you.

I don't think there are words big enough for the hole you've left behind.

Ana wasn't just our dog.

Out of all the people in the world, somehow, you picked me.

And I will spend the rest of my life being grateful that you did.

You came into our life and quietly became a piece of it that I never imagined living without. You became my comfort, my constant, my big beautiful shadow. You were there without needing to be asked. You loved without needing anything in return.

You were simply there.

And sometimes that's the greatest gift a dog can give us.

You were a mother to your babies. A protector. A teacher. A gentle giant with a heart so much bigger than your already enormous body.

And your daughter Scarlett…

Oh, Mama.

Leaving her behind is one of the things that hurts the most.

Because every time I look at Scarlett, I'm going to see you.

I'm going to see pieces of you in her face, in her eyes, in her paws, in her personality, in the way she looks at me. I'm going to hear your voice in the little things she does.

She is your daughter, and because, you will never truly be gone.

A piece of you is still walking around this house.

A piece of you is still sleeping beside us.

A piece of you is still looking back at me through her eyes.

And I hope she knows how incredibly lucky she was to have you as her mama.

You weren't the last one of your family to leave us.

Eris. Artemis. Ember.

Your sisters were already waiting for you.

And now I picture the four of you together again.

No pain.

No weakness.

No fear.

Just four sisters running like puppies again, young and free, exactly the way they were meant to be.

And your brother Drago is still here with us.

And then there's the rest of our crazy pack—the ones who weren't related to you by blood but were family anyway.

Because that's what you taught us.

Family isn't always blood.

Sometimes it's the dog sleeping beside you.

Sometimes it's the one who follows you from room to room.

Sometimes it's the one who comes running when you're hurting.

Sometimes it's the giant girl who simply lays beside you and makes everything feel okay.

You were family to all of us.

And now we're supposed to figure out how to be a family without you.

I don't know how to do that yet.

I still expect to see you.

I still expect your presence.

I still expect those big eyes.

I still expect Mama to be here.

And then reality hits again.

You're not coming back.

God, that hurts.

There are going to be days when I swear I hear you.

Days when I walk into a room and instinctively look for you.

Days when I reach for you before remembering that you're gone.

And I'm going to miss you in a thousand little ways that nobody else will ever understand.

But Ana…

If love could have kept you here, you would have lived forever.

You were loved that much.

You still are.

I hope wherever you are now, you're young again.

I hope you're running.

I hope your body doesn't hurt.

I hope you're breathing easily.

I hope Eris, Artemis, and Ember came running to meet you.

And I hope they told you what I wish I could:

You were the best girl.

You were my girl.

You were our Mama.

And you were loved more than you could ever possibly understand.

Thank you for choosing me.

Thank you for trusting me.

Thank you for loving me.

Thank you for giving us Scarlett.

Thank you for every puppy you nurtured, every soul you comforted, every moment you made our lives better simply by being in them.

I wish I had one more day.

One more hug.

One more look into those eyes.

One more chance to tell you how much I love you.

But if somehow you can hear me now…

I hope you know.

I hope you always knew.

You were never "just a dog."

You were my heart.

And when my heart broke, you were always one of the ones who helped put it back together.

Now you're the one who took a piece of it with you.

So go, Mama.

Go find your sisters.

Go run.

Go be young.

Go be free.

And someday, when it's my turn, I hope you're the first face I see.

Because you chose me once.

And I would choose you…

every single time.

Until then, my beautiful Ana.

Run free, Mama.

You can rest now.

I'll take care of Scarlett.

I'll take care of Drago.

I'll take care of our pack.

And I'll carry you with me for the rest of my life.

You chose me.

I loved you.

I still love you.

And I always will.

Forever our Mama.